As I reflect on being a dad, it is interesting how I thought I had all the answers before I had kids, while after having kids it seems I only had questions! I believe that being a father is one of several growth opportunities in a man’s life. I have found it incredibly beneficial to learn from those with experience. I know that much of the godly advice I have received has changed me and hopefully made me a much better father.
This Sunday we will be celebrating Father’s Day during our morning service. It is a great honor to have so many God-honoring men leading our families. I count it a privilege to come alongside them now as an older man and encourage them. I will be unpacking what the Bible says about “Killing It as a Dad!” I would like to emphasize one truth now: being a good husband. When it comes to impacting our kids, being a good husband is only second to a growing relationship with the Lord. A great husband and wife relationship has a greater impact on our kids than we often consider. I was struck several months ago by a passage for this special day.
Paul reminded the church in Colossians, “Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” (Colossians 3:19). It is natural for us to correctly apply this verse in regard to our relationship with our wife, but I want to challenge you to consider the secondary application of how it applies to our kids.
First, It reflects God’s work in a dad’s life. It is a testimony of, as Paul puts it, dad “seek[ing] the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.” (Colossians 3:1). Some of the most powerful demonstrations of godly character in action are reflected in the most intimate relationships in our lives. To be specific, How is our relationship with our spouse? Do we model godly behavior for our kids? But what about when I blow it? It can also model for them how to resolve conflict Biblically by seeking restoration, confessing our sins, and granting forgiveness. There will be times that we demonstrate covering an offense in love. Our homes are the best training environments for our kids. It reminds us that more is caught than taught.
Second, it reflects the Biblical priority of the husband-and-wife relationship. This priority is also demonstrated in Paul’s instructions, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,” (Ephesians 5:25). It is easy when the kids come along to allow them to become the main focus. We need to be intentional about keeping the marriage the priority. This can be done through appropriate family displays of affection, dates nights with kids, discussing issues privately as a couple before addressing the kids, working on our differences in private, showing honor and respect to our spouse, as well as regularly getting away just as a couple. These all contribute to and model a healthy marriage.
My two biggest spiritual development opportunities have been marriage and family. These have challenged and motivated me to “seek the things above!” This Sunday I will focus on three steps to being a dad who is “Killing It” as we look at the importance of our relationship with the Lord. Guys, keep up the great work!
-Pastor Joe Parkinson